punishment is the most premeditated of murders, to which no criminal's
deed, however calculated, can be compared."
Camus, "Reflections on the Guillotine, Resistance, Rebellion and
not yourselves, beloved, but give place unto the wrath of God:
for it is written, Vengeance belongeth unto me; I will recompense,
saith the Lord."
is a status bloodbath."
the Cockfight at the Baghdad Corral has climaxed with the Snuff
Film of Saddam Hussein. And the important international question
of "Who is the bigger dickhead, Bush or Saddam?" has been answered,
examine the contenders. Measuring up first is Saddam the cocky
Iraqi, the brutal B-movie schmuck of a dick-tator who conducted
mass executions, torture fests and disastrous loser wars while
munching Doritos, writing romantic screenplays, erecting
giant statues of himself and masturbating to Britney Spears videos.
How much more evil and banal can you get?
Most of his large-scale evil was committed with full support and
often under the instructions of the U.S. government. Eventually,
Saddam did have the balls to stand up to his bosses in Washington,
and he seemed to have a good time doing it, winning him a few
pan-Arabic fans, though it eventually cost him everything. He
went limp when it came to defending his government, his country,
his family and his life against the Anglo-American invasion of
2003. He was fished out of a hole, forced to open his mouth for
an American tongue depressor, pushed and prodded through a kangaroo
court, and finally made to bare his neck for the noose. Allahu
on the other end of the Baghdad Corral, so far into the Green
Zone he's not even in Baghdad, stands the American Presidential
dickhead, George W. Bush, also a fan of Britney the Panty-less
One (or is she a fan of his?).
No stranger to hasty executions, during his six years as governor
of Texas, he presided over the implementation of 152 death sentences,
more than any other governor in recent American history. No stranger
to disastrous loser wars either, this self-appointed "War President"
has the cajones to demand more and more of the ultimate "sacrifice"
from Americans outside his family circle.
sure the Bush Family and their cronies don't have to sacrifice
a thing is crucial to this American President's mission. The only
way in which GW Bush is, perhaps, not a dickhead is his sense
of "family values," that is, his Corleone-style devotion to his
own family. Here is where the Biblical origins of the Cockfight
emerge: Saddam insulted Bush's family, specifically, his Dad.
He did this first by sticking his dipstick into the forbidden
American oil harem of Kuwait (though some might say Kuwait was
"asking for it").
international dick-waving contest
was, in my humble sex therapist's
view, at the heart of the reason why
Bush toppled Saddam,
raped his country, slew his sons
and then slaughtered him like a sheep
at festival time. After all, what better
reason was there?
despite being beaten soundly in Gulf War I and heavily sanctioned,
he further affronted the Bush Royals by staying in his saddle
and continuing to rule Iraq like a king with his long hard scepter,
outlasting George I by over a decade. Saddam's final humiliation
of the retired American President was his botched but cocky assassination
attempt during what was supposed to be a laurel-receiving pleasure
trip to Kuwait for the Old Man.
the Texecutioner, Bush Senior's Boy George, chomping-at-the-bit,
the ultimate presidential prick and birdbrain-chickenhawk, ready
and willing to take the Cockfight at the Baghdad Corral to the
next level of bloody sadomasochistic foolishness. Dubya's violent
taunts incited Saddam's empty boasts which greased the way for
the war profiteers and their bombs - American and insurgent -
and soon the Cockfight turned into Perma-War.
This international dick-waving contest was, in my humble sex therapist's
view, at the heart of the reason why Bush toppled Saddam, raped
his country, slew his sons and then slaughtered him like a sheep
at festival time. After all, what better reason was there?
course, all of the reasons the Decider gave at the time of the
invasion were the kinds of tall tales horny guys tell reluctant
girls to get them into bed, except these lies got us into war.
First, there was the bogus 9/11 connection, a ham-fisted but effective
attempt to channel American lust to avenge the national humiliation
that castrated our two architectural big dicks (Dick 1 and Dick
2) into attacking Saddam, even though the bin Ladins were closer
to the Bush Family than to the Husseins.
there was the notion that Saddam was harboring Weapons of Mass
Destruction, or perhaps a WMD "program," turning this mushroom
dickhead into a "mushroom cloud." Since he had already used poison
gas (purchased from West Germany, paid for by America) on Iran
and the Kurds, and since he was always hinting that he might use
some kind of secret WMD against his neighbors, this fantasy was
slightly more plausible. But not really.
As I wrote in the summer of 2002, Saddam was clearly the "kind
of guy who brags he's got nine inches, then won't let you unzip
his pants for fear you'll laugh at his actual four and a half
(and he'd have to kill you for that)." As it turned out, Saddam
was a bit of a eunuch weapons-wise; that is, he had no WMD at
all. When the WMD excuse and the 9/11 connection fell apart, Bush
fell back on the Bad Guy reason, i.e., "Saddam is a really Bad
Guy, like Hitler, like Attila the Hun, like a really big dickhead,
and he tried to kill my dad, so we need to exterminate the mofu,
fact that Saddam witnessed
America's intimate involvement
in most of his worst war crimes is
one of the key reasons
he was snuffed so hastily.
Bad Guy reason works well enough, despite the existence of multiple
Bad Guys oppressing other countries that we do nothing about.
And yes, of course, we invaded Iraq because of the oil, though
it's considered rude to say so. It's the Bush Family business,
as well as Saddam's business. In terms of the Cockfight, it's
the prize. A nice greasy expensive prize makes any cockfight more
so the cockfight has climaxed with a hanging. One dick dangles
from a noose while the other dick explodes with sadistic glee
as he and his proxy executioners make a typical mess of things.
Not only is Bush II covered with the sticky jism of revenge ecstasy
in this faux victory, he's covered in blood. Lots of blood.
The hanging of Saddam looks like a lynching party, sounds like
a Shi'a-Mafia hit and smells like a sacrifice (there's that creepy
word "sacrifice" again). And it's all caught on tape, authorized
and unauthorized. The execution, along with the revolution, will
Snuffing of Saddam, just like all of Bush's War, from the Cockfight
at the Baghdad Corral, to the Bukkake Bombing Crusade of Shock
& Awe, through the awful Rape of Iraq, on into Bush's POW
Porn of Abu Ghraib (and Guantanamo), was a hasty, fumbled, barbaric
those of you who know me know, I believe that all executions are
wrong. Capital punishment has been shown to be impotent as a deterrent
to crime. Indeed, it sets the example that killing is the way
to solve problems. One of the first tragedies to come out of the
Saddam execution was the hanging death of 10-year-old Sergio Pelico.
Little Sergio was found dead Jan. 1, 2007, in his apartment bedroom
in Houston, Texas, after watching Saddam's execution on the news.
Police and family members said Sergio was apparently mimicking
what he saw in Saddam's snuff film (and this was just the authorized
version) when he hanged himself from a bunk bed. Some like Maliki
(and Bush) would call for censorship of the snuff film. But the
problem isn't with the snuff film. The problem is with the killing.
Any killing that is not immediate self-defense is murder, and
murder is wrong. An enlightened state should not murder its citizens.
the Snuffing of Saddam was a little worse than wrong. It was pathetic.
It was an out-of-control, premature ejaculation of an execution,
a terrible embarrassment for the American invader/occupiers and
the Iraqi judges/executioners. Continuing the "cockfight" metaphor,
it was the slaughtering of a chicken in a squawking hen house,
except these chicken-killers were having much more fun. "Moqtada!
the chicken was not so chicken. Cocky yet dignified right up until
the disturbing finish, despite the taunts of his killers, Saddam
kept his cool. Having been dubbed "Saddam's Sex Therapist" by
the ranting Taranto of the Wall Street Journal, I must confess
I was proud of his bearing. This dick held his head high. He looked
slim, even sexy in that aging don sort of way, almost noble.
He didn't squawk, cry, spit or sing "Oops!... I Did It Again,"
though he did question his tormentors' manhood. He also refused
to wear the hood, perhaps so we, his snuff film audience (and
you know he knew he was being filmed), could see that striking
mafioso movie star face, the face he'd had carved into monuments,
right through the awful end.
the moment one dickhead was being sacrificed, the other was fast
asleep in his warm soft White House bed. Was Bush having wet dreams
of Saddam's head, eyes staring into death, lips stretched into
a ghoulish grin, bobbing on the hangman's noose?
It would not be such an odd dream for this American Executioner
who seems to come alive through the sacrificial deaths of others,
both enemies and loyal soldiers, smirking uncontrollably as he
cradles Saddam's gun in his clammy little hands, telling himself
that this triumphal ritual sacrifice, this grand finale on the
gallows means he wins the Cockfight, seals the deal that he, George
W. Bush, is the biggest dickhead, the strongest evil, the blunderer-without-compare,
the executioner of the free world.
yet Saddam might turn out to be the bigger dickhead, after all.
Thanks to the snuff film(s), he's being transformed into a martyr.
George can't be happy about this...
could this cockfight have gone so crazy? The Washington handlers
can't figure it out. Just like all of Bush's Iraqi adventures,
this one seemed at first to be an easy fight, the perfect crime.
Clearly, Saddam was a Bad Guy, badder than all the penny ante
killers and framed losers that George had executed in Texas, and
badder than all the hundreds of thousands of other Iraqis the
Anglo-American invasion and occupation has killed in this war,
the great majority of whom are not bad at all.
is erecting a commemorative
statue of Saddam near the site
of a monument to Omar al Mukhtar,
a Libyan national symbol who resisted
the Italian invasion of Libya and
was hanged by the Italians in 1931.
Even Egypt's "moderate"
President Hosni Mubarak told
Israel's Yediot Aharanot, "No one will
ever forget the way in which
Saddam was executed.
They turned him into a martyr."
was bad. He was a prick. He had a lot of people tortured and killed,
even pulled the trigger himself a few times, and seemed to enjoy
it. He kept the "nation" we call Iraq together through force and
fear. He also tried to keep Iraq together out of love, as evidenced
by all the portraits of him looking warm and avuncular. But love
didn't work very well, Saddam being more Stalin than Fidel, so
it was back to force, fear and other Bad Guy tactics.
Saddam also had notoriously bad taste in music, snacks and bathroom
fixtures. In a way, he "deserved" to die, at least in the eyes
of people who believe in capital punishment. So you'd think that
the White House dickhead (well, two dickheads, one of whom is
actually named Dick) would get some traction, a little bump in
the polls after this grand finale, this glorious slaying of the
Evil Saddam in the Cockfight in the Baghdad Corral. They thought
they had it timed perfectly, announcing the triumphal death sentence
as foreplay to the American erection, er, election. But the voters
were collectively unimpressed with the results of George and Dick's
Death Fetish Run Amok in Iraq, and voted their party out of power.
suddenly, quick as a popper exploding on New Year's Eve, Saddam
was snuffed. I don't know about you, but I was shocked at the
speed of this action. Shouldn't an appeals process take a few
months, if not years? Besides, there were other related trials
still going on, so why kill one of the main witnesses? Why, indeed.
The fact that Saddam witnessed America's intimate involvement
in most of his worst war crimes is one of the key reasons he was
snuffed so hastily.
New Year's Eve, I got into a polite argument with one of my guests
about whether Saddam should have been offed like that. She's not
a Bush supporter, but she hated Saddam, was excited by his hanging
and wanted to celebrate it. This was just the kind of feeling
Bush was hoping to capitalize on. I imagined Bushites around the
world clinking flutes of champagne, toasting the New Year and
the execution of Hitler-on-the-Eurphrates. What fantastic timing!
maybe not. The execution "happened" to occur on the first day
of the Eid al-Adha, the "Feast of the Sacrifice." Celebrated by
Muslims worldwide, this is a major Winter Solstice holiday, a
climax of the Hajj that commemorates the willingness of the Prophet
Abraham to sacrifice his son Ishmael to God, similar to the old
Genesis tale in which God asks Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac.
In Islam as in Judaism, God stops Abraham just before he kills
his son by giving him a lamb to sacrifice instead. This is a holiday
of great forgiveness in the Arab world which even Saddam himself
used to celebrate by suspending executions and even releasing
some prisoners from his infamous jails. At 6 am on Eid al-Adha,
after being handed over by his American guards to Iraqi President
Nuri Kamal al-Maliki's "officials" in leather jackets and ski
masks, Saddam was hung by the neck until he died.
a man on this Feast of the Sacrifice, and he becomes the sacrificial
lamb, the scapegoat, Christ-in-the-gallows dying for the sins
of America in the Middle East.
so now that this cockfight
is over, can we go home already?
Since there are no WMDs and
Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11,
there was only the issue of
"removing the tyrant." Now the
tyrant has been 86'ed. So are our
troops packing? Hardly. In fact,
we're "surging." By continuing
the American occupation of Iraq,
Bush and his fellow cockfighters
reveal, once again, that all their
talk about the purpose of the
invasion being to "liberate"
Saddam's oppressed people
is just a load of chickenpoop.
irony is resonating. Despite Saddam's massive efforts to plaster
his brutally jovial puss on as many sides of buildings as possible,
this dick didn't have a lot of sincere fans in his day. Now he
does. First there is the spiritual side: Saddam is a martyr, and
his death was an Arab sacrifice. Then there is the rational side:
Bad as Saddam was, life in Iraq is now much worse.
Arabs around the world are carrying the Beast of Baghdad's portrait
through the streets. Libya is erecting a commemorative statue
of Saddam near the site of a monument to Omar al Mukhtar, a Libyan
national symbol who resisted the Italian invasion of Libya and
was hanged by the Italians in 1931. Even Egypt's "moderate" President
Hosni Mubarak told Israel's Yediot Aharanot, "No one will ever
forget the way in which Saddam was executed. They turned him into
that he is, in fact, dead. Some say the man in the snuff film
was actually one of Saddam's famous doubles. I doubt it, though
with the wily Saddam, you never know. Wouldn't that be something
if the cocky Iraqi turns out to be orchestrating his own martyrdom
from some condo on the Côte d'Azur?
let's assume the ghastly head we saw hanging in the gallows was,
in fact, the head of former President Saddam Hussein... Ding dong,
the dickhead is dead, long live the dickhead! Allahu Akbar
and God Bless America.
so now that this cockfight is over, can we go home already? Since
there are no WMDs and Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11, there
was only the issue of "removing the tyrant." Now the tyrant has
been 86'ed. So are our troops packing? Hardly. In fact, we're
"surging." By continuing the American occupation of Iraq, Bush
and his fellow cockfighters reveal, once again, that all their
talk about the purpose of the invasion being to "liberate" Saddam's
oppressed people is just a load of chickenpoop.
Cockfight at the Baghdad Corral is over, but nobody won, and the
Perma-War continues. The corral has morphed into a sacrificial
mound. How many more will be sacrificed on the altar of the remaining
dickhead's massive ego and family jewels?
Susan Block is a sex educator, cultural commentator, host
of The Dr. Susan Block Show and author of The 10 Commandments
of Pleasure. Visit her website at http://www.drsusanblock.com
or visit her brand new bloggamy and post comments at
Send all comments, love letters, hate mail, questions, confessions,
endorsements, enticements and testimonials to her at [email protected].
Read other articles by Dr Susan Block (click on the balls)
God Has Sex, Makes Big Box Office
Life, Death And Cartoons
Pack Your Bags, George.
America Wants A Divorce!
Peeping Tom In The Bush
Between Pleasure And Violence
Our Night Of Weimar Love
Family Values Means Family First And Screw The Community
It Always Rains In California: All About Female Ejaculation
Springtime For Sex And God
The bigO Can Be Yours
Bush's P.O.W. Porn